I'm Feeling Naked Already....

This is quite personal and I have never told anyone about this, but, this blog is about "me", getting "me", and putting "me" down on paper, and hopefully learn to better express myself as time goes on.
So, something happened to me a few years ago that has had a profound effect on me.... I was never the girly mushy squishy feelings gushing out kind of girl growing up, so this event caught me by surprise:

I was watching "Proof of Life" one night (with Meg Ryan and Russell Crowe ) all by myself about 7 years ago, when it came time for the 2 main characters to kiss or not kiss, (dramatic moment in a doorway w/ married woman and the hunky hero ) I found myself sitting on the edge of the coffee table with my hands waving around, arguing with the screen - Kiss her! –- No, don't kiss her ! –-- No, kiss her ! --- when all of a sudden my physical heart did something weird, it gave an extra beat or I guess you could say that it "leapt", it was the oddest most wonderful sensation with a heatlike tingling energy emanating from my heart area, I’ve never felt it before ( funny comparison would be like the grinch’s heart: “it grew three sizes that day” busted out of the box, ha ha ha ) and for the record I was never ever a cold person at all, I love big long hug’s and men, and kissing, oh wow – yup, love kissing… anyhoo, from then on every time I see a kiss on screen it happens again and again. My mind feels more connected to my heart since then, like all this fruu fruu love stuff from poems and movies, songs -it’s a tangible thing now to me. I understand it all so much better and has made me want it more. I want to write poetry now, write songs and maybe even try an actual novel.
Okay…. now here is that feeling I knew was coming… the feeling that I should delete all of this, forget about it and move on, but I can’t or really I shouldn't do it. This “naked” feeling I am experiencing is part of it all. This is what writing is about. I suppose that’s when you know you are on the right track.

Jason's blog post tonight......

It's rare that an artist can make you feel like you are in the room with them, being connected to the bits of emotion and pieces of himself that came together for a particular lyric or verbiage or comment.

Jason did it again, he posted a poem tonight that were not even of his words and he was present IN them.

He is very inspiring to me creatively. I have always wanted to write a novel. Never written any kind of stories before. Never took classes for writing. I'd most likely have poor grammar/ puctuation issues glaring out at the reader BUT I feel that it is possible, that I have the ability to express what I want to express, it may take me longer for me to get it right since I have no training but I am excited for the challenge, excited to try. I won't be heartbroken if it's horrible, I'll know that I tried:) and I will try again.

Goodnight.

~ D

The "South" hee hee

I went to the mechanics shop yesterday to get my tire replaced since it had a huge bubble in it and there was a Rooster ( named Roo-Roo) walking around cockadoodledooing. It was quite funny to me because sometimes I forget that I moved to Georgia until I see something like this. It has been 11 years and I am still seeing things that make me laugh because you would never see those things in Massachusetts.

I had major homesickness yesterday, it doesn't happen too often but when it does I just want to hop a flight to see old friends and family, give my BFF a big hug and laugh with her in person instead of on the phone. Drive around the streets that I grew up on and see the old house, see my Dad. I should stop talking about it or I'll feel homesick all over again.

Well, that's it for today, not much going on, still unemployed, mother still lives with me, a friend from Florida called 2 days ago and asked if he could stay here while he get's re-established in Georgia, I said sure, the more the merrier I say ! :)

♥D